Adding to the List.

Six months ago I made this crazy decision to run a 5k with a friend who had taken on running. I’d gone from my usual workout on the elliptical to running on a treadmill, and I (surprisingly) really liked the challenge I was presenting my body with. I ran the 5k in a little over 30 minutes, but never really stopped running after it was over. About a month later I got a postcard in the mail promoting a training program called Team in Training, and a couple of weeks later I was at the first group training session, running through the snow for a lofty goal: to run my first half marathon.

I loved the training—my goal-oriented personality loved that I was checking things off of a list and that I had a plan to follow. Team in Training held deep meaning for me personally, as it’s an initiative of the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society, whose mission is to eliminate blood-related cancers. I was training in honor of my Dad, who is a Non-Hodgkin Lymphoma survivor, and I met a lot of great people along the way. Reminding myself that the pain that I was feeling was nothing compared to the pain he experienced fighting cancer kept me in check when I wanted to stop, and participating with a team whose interests were similar made waking up at 6:30 a.m. every Saturday even more worthwhile.

As I trained for the race I couldn’t help but think about where I’ve come from in the last ten years to get to where I am today. One day, just a couple of days before the race, I was challenged by a friend to look at old photos of myself, to remind myself of where I’ve come from. It wasn’t easy, and it was a bit painful, but I’d like to introduce you (further) to the guy who finished his first half marathon last weekend in 2:27:46.

This is me in high school, around my sophomore or junior year. I weighed over 300 lbs, but I’m not sure how much I weighed exactly because I wouldn’t let the doctor’s office weigh me. I didn’t want to face the reality of my size. But I can tell you that the pants I’m wearing in this photo are at least a size 52.

Jump forward a few years, and you’ll find me as a junior in college at Anderson University. I continued to ignore the fact that I needed to lose weight, but I’d always wear this jacket because I thought it somehow helped mask the fact that I was wearing at least a size 58 pant.

November, 2007

Then.. this photo happened. This was taken of me one day while myself and some colleagues were working on a design show we were a part of. I knew I was big. I knew I needed to lose weight, but I guess I didn’t realize that my belly was as huge as it was. When I saw this photo I was disgusted by myself. I knew that a change was necessary, but I didn’t know how or when or how long any of it would take.

April, 2008

I joined Weight Watchers on Jan. 21, 2008, and while it was one of the most frightening things I’ve done, it’s become the most rewarding thing I’ve ever done. I’ve been surrounded by amazing people who have inspired, encouraged and celebrated with me every step of the way, no matter what road blocks I may hit.

This photo was taken after I’d lost about 60 lbs. I remember getting an overwhelming response as to how great I looked. At the time I didn’t realize how different I did look, but those words still motivate me when I’m having a rough day.

Fast forward to last Saturday, May 8th, 2010, and you’ll find me in downtown Indianapolis, packed into a line-up more than five blocks long, with over 30,000 other runners. Four months of preparation, training and fundraising for Team in Training had come down to this moment, and while I’m now just a shadow of the man I used to be, the big guy in me wondered if I could really do this. 10.6 miles was the longest I’d ever run, all kinds of people were depending on me, what if I messed it up when I was this close to fulfilling a dream.

I crossed the starting line, and other than stopping for water a couple of times and a few bathroom breaks, I didn’t stop running. I loved running the race. I felt strong, I was energetic, the crowd support was awesome. I cried a couple of times along the course, in disbelief that I was actually doing it. I couldn’t help but think the entire time that two years ago, even after losing the 73 lbs that I had at that point, I couldn’t ever imagine doing what I was doing. I ran, and ran, and ran. And before I knew it, I was into my last mile.

I crossed the 12.75 mile line and a group of friends were right there, cheering and encouraging me. Another .25 miles up the way were my parents, cheering and waving as I crossed the 13 mile line. And right at the finish were another group of friends, cheering loudly and proudly for me as I added a new photo to my list:

2:27:46 | That's me in the purple TNT jersey.

I’d actually done it. I immediately started crying, because I just couldn’t believe it. I had set my mind to something, I’d worked to accomplish that goal, and it had really happened. It was truly a dream come true. It was a big week in other ways, too. To date, I’ve lost 231.5 lbs. I weigh less than what I’ve lost, and according to the BMI, I’m finally overweight… not OBESE!

Dad and I after the Mini

If there’s one thing I hope you get from this post, it’s this: If you believe in yourself, you can do anything you put your mind to. It seems like such a simple concept, but we continuously build walls around our hopes, goals and dreams because we’re afraid. Stop carrying around your fear. Accept the challenges that are before you, believe in yourself, and start living. I wish you all the best as you work towards a better you.

keep moving,
dane.

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